The Lone Ranger

Gore Verbinski and Jerry Bruckheimer reteam with Johnny Depp in a not-so-subtle attempt to capture the box office success of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. Even the previews flash the Pirates' logo, which isn't typically an advertising strategy. With a budget of $215 million, it has been a disappointment, taking in only $80m at home, and $65m globally. It should be fine when it finishes it's run and counts its DVD sales, but it is a big disappointment for a film of that magnitude. Maybe the fickle moviegoer is looking for something a bit more oh, I don't know, Marvel?

The film starts with an uptight, non-violent, law abiding prosecutor named John Reid (Armie Hammer) making his way to Colby, Texas to meet up with his famous Texas Ranger brother and his wife who he secretly has always loved. It's a bit awkward without any sort of pretext about their more amorous relationship. It's OK though, because John's brother, Dan (James Badge Dale) understands and even seems embarrassed when his posse sees the two of them together, exchanging longing glances. Weird love triangle. Anyway, the railroad is coming through Texas to San Francisco, and outlaws and politicians want to get rich with secret silver mines. That's really about it as far as plot goes. Oh, there's a wanted outlaw named Butch Cavendish (played almost unrecognizably by William Fichtner) who has an agenda, and keeps getting away from the law while making Reid more and more vengeful.

Armie Hammer isn't a very good fit for this role. He does have the physical size and chiseled face of an action star, but I can't take his words seriously when he sounds so much like George W. Bush. Gore and Jerry took a big gamble casting him instead of someone more fitting of the role like... the next Robert Downey Jr. as Iron Man. Because the film had strong overtones of humor, I would have liked to have seen someone who is a bit stronger with natural comedy. Maybe a Jason Bateman, Chris Pine, James Marsden if you're going for recognizable 30-somethings. Matthew Gray Gubler, Eric Christian Olson or Matt Lauria if you're going for lesser known actors. It's easy to Monday-morning quarterback casting decisions, but Armie Hammer should have thrown off some red flags (maybe he did). Anyway, the gamble didn't pay off.

Johnny Depp's name is synonymous with quirky characters, and Tonto is a natural fit for him. Except that he's white. And that the racial stereotypes of the Comanchee Indians aren't as amusing as they might have been 30 years ago. The Lone Ranger is a tale from a simpler time that just doesn't really fit without a serious update, and that didn't happen. The stereotypes continued, and Depp clearly enjoyed the role and was much more the star than the Lone Ranger, which is a bit disheartening to me. He was the more heroic and clever of the two, and wasn't even the truly smartest of the bunch. That award goes to Silver, the genius white spirit horse that saves the day far too often. Depp continues his streak of strange anti-heroes, dating back to Edward Scissorhands. He shows great effort and makes for a few good laughs, but I wasn't hooked. There aren't a whole lot of Native American actors that come to mind, but maybe Adam Beach or Benjamin Bratt could have brought more realism to the role. Of course, Johnny Depp is the box office draw, so the film couldn't justify the budget (or even production at all) without a very strong lead.

I went to see this with my dad, who grew up in the 50's with the Lone Ranger as a superhero figure. Created in 1933, it was only 50 or so years removed from real life cowboys of the West. 1933 was 80 years ago, and I am not so sure that the nostalgic appeal can adequately or realistically exist in today's day and age. The idea of the cowboy fighting for justice was about as prevalent as anything in cinema during that era, and the Lone Ranger was a paradigm of vigilante justice that never, ever crossed the line, which sadly often was skin color. Think about it, savage Indians make for great villains. replaced in today's culture by zombies or even aliens, they are nameless, faceless beings that are just trying to harm the good guys and the pretty girls. There's some sort of human drive to want clear heroes and villains, but I couldn't get behind the Lone Ranger.

First of all, this movie is much too long at two and a half hours. For an action Western that doesn't have plot substance and relies on big budget special effects, it is more Wild Wild West or Back to the Future 3 than Unforgiven or True Grit (either version). It is a stylized special effects heavy Western, which left me feeling a bit deflated. Second of all, the humor and action intended for children gets a bit too violent for what really should be the target audience of Disney; a new generation of wide-eyed children who love heroes and horses. A man eating a heart isn't quite child friendly, and doesn't add anything to the villainy of his already despicable character. Second, the majority of the action took place on a train. Sure, some of the sequences are pretty cool, but for $215 million, I would feel a bit ripped off. Westerns to me seem to be a goldmine budget-wise. Sets and costumes are about all that's necessary. Third of all, The Lone Ranger didn't show up with confidence until the final fight scene, and he didn't even shine very brightly. Throughout the whole film, he was tentative, and not the beacon of hope and justice that he needed to be. I blame the writers for that, not Armie.

Written by Justin Haythe (Snitch, Revolutionary Road), Ted Elliott (Pirates quadrilogy, Zorro, Shrek), and Terry Rossio (see Ted Elliott), it was lackluster to say the least. It was unimaginative and formulaic. Too much of a vehicle for Depp to showcase his oddity. Tom Wilkinson was wasted as a railroad man out for exorbitant wealth, and the only real screen presence belonged to William Fichtner's Butch, who wasted much of his character's overhyped, but initially promising reputation with the cliche "talking too much while pointing a gun at someone".

Overall, this film was a disappointment, but it's been out for a few weeks, so I knew what I was getting into, and I was happy to see it because my dad was a big fan of the Lone Ranger growing up. I just hope he wasn't too disappointed. 5/10.