Noah

Director Darren Aronofsky is a visionary of the highest order in the film-making world, and the biblical epic Noah is a behemoth task for anyone, but he definitely brings his unique style to the screen through fantastic visual effects, desolate landscapes, and a somewhat creative interpretation of a story that is commonly known to anyone who has any Christian background.

Let's start with the good, and move to the bad, shall we? Russell Crowe was a pretty good choice considering the magnitude of the role. He was a subtle bad-ass evoking a bit of his inner Maximus. A true manly man. The visual effects and computer generated images are astounding. You think about what might be the most daunting aspect of filming Noah's Ark, and the answer is obvious; the animals. The team tackling this feat did an incredible job. It's a logistical nightmare to think about two of each species crammed into a wooden boat (pardon the bluntness) but the filmmakers make sense of the whole thing by bringing in the birds, then the reptiles, and finally the mammals. Convenient as it is, the caretakers create an herbal mix as a sort of anesthesia that puts all of the animals into a deep slumber when burned as incense. It's ridiculous and frank, but I found it somewhat comforting in answering the questions that blow holes in the logic of the story. The best thing about the film however, is Aronofsky's story played out on the screen with trademark visceral dream sequences and stop-motion camerawork. The growth of plantlife, or progression of time happening right before the audience's eyes is captivating. It's almost as if watching a Terry Gilliam or Terrence Malik sequence. Pretty cool stuff, definitely an indicator of his directorial skills.

Now the bad. Firstly, the women were too beautiful for the setting. Jennifer Connelly? Having three children and living in squalor as a Bedouin would not allow a woman to look as clean and radiant. Same with Emma Watson. She's a good looking young woman, but not believable for a biblical nomad in a desert wasteland. Not that I'm complaining at the Hollywood eye candy, but it just doesn't fit for the time. Secondly, although Russell Crowe can't help being an alpha male, his invincibility in combat, although magnificent in the protector role, is a bit too much. I always envisioned Noah being a bit more meek and humble, not as intimidating and violent. He battles evil men who have little or no godliness in their souls, and he crushes every one of them. Maybe I was hoping for a bit more competition. Thirdly, the Watchers, as they are so simply called are out of place. Fallen angels who have been sentenced to live out existence shackled to a craggy rock shell. It's cool for a Lord of the Rings character, or something in the sci-fi genre, but for a biblical story, certain liberties should be avoided. Giant rock monsters being one of them. Also a bit unbelievable is the depravity of men. No matter how bad the sons of Cain might have been, I refuse to believe that civilization ever got to Lord of the Flies status. People cannibalizing, raping, pillaging, etc. It makes for a great action story arc, but consider the source.

I can't imagine a better blend of mainstream Hollywood action and Old Testament lore. That said, it's a stretch to say it was a great film because it was trying so hard to please both. Kudos to Aronofsky for taking on this daunting project, and his ability to fill in the gaps is commendable. Vision from God. Build a boat. Flood the world. He manages to make it look pretty cool.

Besides Russell Crowe, we have a supporting cast of weak-minded and helpless people, including the wasted role on Anthony Hopkins as Methuselah, the prophet on the mountain. The only one who stands toe to toe with Crowe is Ray Winstone (The Departed, Beowolf, Sexy Beast) as the evil antagonist, King of the Cain descendants who seeks to commandeer the giant wooden vessel to survive. Winstone's gravelly voice sends chills down the spine, and he's given a pretty malevolent role.

Full of symbolism and beauty, Noah is a great allegory for the folly of man. It's a rendering of a story that hasn't been tackled before, and although Mel Gibson's Passion of the Christ opened the floodgates for deep biblical films a decade ago, not every story needs to have a cinematic counterpart. Noah is a blockbuster. It's wildly entertaining, whether you know the story or not, and it's the first really cool film of 2014. I'm really curious how Ridley Scott's Exodus will turn out (Christian Bale as Moses). I'm guessing not as well as he intends.

It's a wide crevasse between Christianity and Hollywood entertainment, and Darren Aronofsky straddles it as best he can, but the chasm is just too wide and he is forced to jump toward Hollywood. Fun action blockbuster, not for kids. And what's up with the rock monsters? 7/10.